Perhaps
by Zofie C. Field
Summary: It's been a very long year. Cosima and Delphine are cloud watching in the summertime, daydreaming and considering what the next year will bring.


**Perhaps**

In the past year, Cosima had lost sisters, found sisters, become an aunt, fallen in love, betrayed and been betrayed, stayed in love anyway, procured her dream lab and tore it down in hate, gotten ill, fostered hope and lost it, found a cure.

In the past year, Delphine had been recruited and fooled by a madman, fallen unexpectedly and wholeheartedly in love, lied and spoken truth, betrayed with and without regret, begged for forgiveness and been forgiven, risked everything to save a life, been scared to death and lived anyway.

That's quite a lot for a single year.

* * *

"That one over there, just above the tree. It looks like a DNA helix. Do you see it? That one."

Cosima lay sprawled on the grass, head resting on Delphine's stomach. Delphine lay, knees bent, head propped up on her book bag, fingers winding through Cosima's hair. Cosima linked her fingers with Delphine's, stretching their arms high to point out the cloud.

"A helix? No," Delphine replied, shaking her head. "It's a boat. Those long, thin ones. What's the word? Canoe?"

"You're crazy, pretty lady, that's definitely DNA." Cosima shifted their arms, their skin brushing, goosebumps forming. "Now _that _one over there, that might be a canoe. Or a kayak. Cloud shaping isn't an exact science, after all. It's more of an art form."

"Mmm," Delphine murmured, "I considered studying Cloud Shaping at university, but the coursework was too extensive. Far beyond me."

Cosima chuckled and they fell quiet, staring up at the sky. After a long time, long after she'd felt Delphine's breathing start to slow, Cosima broke the silence.

"A lot has happened this year."

Delphine kept her eyes closed, murmuring in response, fingers dancing lightly across Cosima's forehead.

"Parts of it were good, of course," Cosima said, turning her head to brush her lips along Delphine's ribs. "But a lot of it wasn't. A lot of it was…" She faded off for a moment, remembering the horror of the past year. "I think we should do next year in style, huh? To make up for this year."

"What will we do?" Delphine asked this quietly, opening her eyes and watching her girlfriend carefully.

Cosima shrugged, but as she did so, the words were already coming. "Things we haven't done before. Things that are different. Go to France together; climb the Eiffel Tower and eat lots of bread. Hold hands and kiss in public, draw attention on the street. Live like lovers should."

"My parents will like to meet you," Delphine added, playing along with the daydream. "My mother will be hesitant at first, but my father will love you the moment he sees your smile. He's very smart about people."

Cosima nodded, "And we could travel on from there. Do all of Europe, maybe Asia too. Climb a pyramid, ride an elephant."

"I have always wanted to go to India. Put that on the list."

"We could take new names, wear new clothes, flat sandals, and no makeup. We could become entirely new people." Cosima was quiet for a long moment. Voice low, she finally added, "Leave all of this behind and forget we almost lost everything."

They lay in silence, Cosima willing herself to continue dreaming, and Delphine reluctant to stop her.

Finally, Delphine spoke, gently. One hand still rested on Cosima's head, thumb stroking down her temple, and the other rested on Cosima's stomach, their fingers entwined. "Or perhaps, Cosima, we could stay here. Find an apartment or a little house, and paint it to match the sky. Hang Felix's art on the walls and smile when we see it. Learn to cook beautiful meals and drink them with cheap wine."

She hesitated, watching for a reaction that didn't come, and then continued. "Perhaps we could get to know your sisters, learn them inside and out like family should. Invite your niece to our house for sleepovers, popcorn and the movies we used to love."

Cosima stayed silent, her eyes slipping closed. "Perhaps," continued Delphine, voice still soft, "we could take time to get you well, to see you healthy again. Eat salads and beans, and go for long walks in the park in the evening. Perhaps we could wake up early in our own bed, make love as the sun comes up. Spend our days on science, side by side, making small discoveries to touch the world. Curl up each night around each other and talk of days to come."

Her voice was quiet, but firm now as she finished, "A lot has happened this past year. I'd like to get to know you, to hear how you laugh, without all of that weight. Perhaps we could do that."

Cosima's cheeks were wet, but neither wiped them dry. They lay there, eyes closed, warm bodies in the sun.

"Perhaps," Cosima whispered as the clouds passed by. "Perhaps we could do that."


End file.
